After bringing three girls into the world, there seems to be an impression that the Cap’n and I had a fourth child in order to have a boy.
In my grandparents’ day, boys were valued more than girls. (I often got this feeling even in my day, as well.) I have a letter my grandmother wrote to her parents from college in which she reported that one of her classmates’s siblings had recently given birth to a little girl. But my grandmother was all too happy (in a feline sort of way) to report that she had trumped THAT piece of news: her cousin had given birth to a BOY.
Israeli society is still like this, unfortunately. Boys elicit a hearty Mazal tov! while girls get you the equivalent of “Better luck next time.” And nothing is more maddening than the look of disbelief and skepticism in the hearer’s eyes when I say we would have been just as delighted had Bill been a girl. (Not least because I’ve always wanted to name a child Wilhelmina Delphinium Crunch.) The way they see it, after all the brachas strangers gave me on the street that Beans should be a boy, the fact that she was a girl was the luck of the draw (oh well, it has to happen sometimes). But people who think like this are the same people who probably think Peach and Banana were similar failed attempts at a boy, and that Bill is the first successful product of our union (at last).
And people wonder why girls have low self esteem.
In truth, the first child I could have whose sex would not necessarily be seen as the motivator would be my fifth. *Sigh*
Well, I have a message for such people: Families whose children are all boys often get dreamy-eyed when the subject of girls comes up. In our experience, families whose children are all girls never seem to pine for a boy. Whether this is because the latter families are conscious that such facial expressions are hurtful to their daughters, or because they are grateful that their daughters will have a choice about going into the army or not, or because we fortunately live in a time when it’s not unheard of for the groom’s family to contribute to the wedding costs, I don’t know.
All I’m saying is that each child is an individual: mild or wild, fiery or calm, sweet or sassy. Each of my children could just as easily have ended up the opposite sex and still had the same personality. They’ll encounter different challenges as girls or boys, but they’ll still be my children, and they’ll still be wonderful people.
Shimshonit 
a couple is yotzei (fulfilled their obligation) once they have a child of each sex (I think this exists officially in Judaism
IIRC this is Hillel’s position. Shammai says you’re done if you have two children, regardless of their sex.
I may note that by our third bris the mohel was comfortable doing business with me while hubby was downstairs for the seudah (baby #3 was upstairs for *his* seudah, so that was where I was, too). As he turned over the gauze-wrapped foreskin and I handed him his check he said to me “next time you better have a girl, this is getting expensive for you.”
I am afraid you are expressing a feeling that is prevalent in most cultures.
Strangely enough, my family has constantly expressed their dissatisfaction with the fact that I have two boys, and no girls. I still recall with *great* emotional frustration my mother calling family from my hospital room, after I had my second boy, saying, “Well, it’s another boy… oh well.”
To further my point… my sister has two girls. Our aunts actually send her girls birthday presents, holiday presents, etc. My boys have never received anything from them, and yet, technically, the only difference in relationship is that my sister has girls, and I have boys. It’s not like one of us was closer or not to our extended family.
What they have said is that girls are cuter, prettier, and sweeter, and more fun to shop for. Ok. Whatever. I’m not into playing dress up with my kids, but maybe that’s because I have boys.
Every one is saying this time I’ll have a girl, or two girls (since it’s twins!). And when I say I wouldn’t mind if I ended up with two boys again, I get this, “Sure, you’re just saying that.” But I really don’t care! Boy, girl, whatever — I just want healthy babies!
(For the record, Eli really wants a girl, as he always wanted a daughter. But he’ll be happy with boys, too.)
lucretia: What you spent on britot is considerable, but what we will spend on toilet paper, feminine sanitary products and weddings will dwarf it I think. But I take your point.
ilanadavita: I feared as much.
Rachel: Is it because you’re frum? (Can’t remember if your sister is.) That’s a great way to alienate family. They also don’t see/know your boys as well if they live farther away. But it is true that girls are easier to buy for; girls of a certain age will usually be content with whatever Disney Princess crap is out there, where boys probably expect, you know, quality and interesting stuff. My mother-in-law probably figured that as a feminist I was teaching my girls to love Tinker Toys, but they would always cry when she didn’t bring them clothes and nail polish. (Sorry, C.) And for the record, I’m with you on the twins. So much so that I may have to purchase some Depends to get me through the next few months…
I wish I could say it’s because we’re religious, but my sister is also religious. On the *other* hand, distance I’m sure makes some difference. My sister lived near family for the first years of her older daughter, who just turned 6, though they don’t live near family any more (still get presents, tho!). So distance I’m sure plays a roll.
As for Depends, with all the pressure on my bladder, that may be a practical need for me soon! LOL