I recently received the following in my email inbox.
My dear Shimshonit,
While monitoring the activities of my employer’s forces as reflected in news outlets, blogs, and YouTube (such a delightful source of devilry!), I recently came across your blog.
You caught my attention for your spirited defense of history, truth, and fact, especially in relation to Israel. Really, dear lady, I should have thought someone with your educational background and relative sanity would have more sense. After all these years, do you still not recognize the futility of such an exercise?
Since I know you yourself have admitted that news agencies are not about news, but about advertising, readership, and ratings, it amazes me that you still think it worthwhile to get frothy about what they print and say. Do you think for a moment that you—a Jew, an Israeli, a settler even—could possibly alter the ossified mindset of those who oppose you in the court of public opinion? Do you not know that my employer’s most dedicated servants, in the guise of the “humanistic,” blindly underdog-loving Left, are far more numerous, influential, and powerful than you? Can you not accept that facts and history have no bearing on the rest of the world, which is too busy concocting slanderous accusations at Israel to see the slaughter that takes place at dozens of other flashpoints on the globe, too set in its ways to listen to others’ opinions, and too lazy to open a book whose recorded facts might challenge its assumptions about the Middle East?
No, Shimshonit, it is time you learned some home truths about this ridiculous planet you live on. First, you are not popular now, and never will be. You are a Jew (and a Jew by choice, which I for one will never understand). And Jews, if you haven’t realized this by now, are crafty, devious, deceptive, and not to be trusted. This is why, no matter what you say about how you live and see the world, you will never be believed. You say Arabs have benefited from Israeli rule of Judea and Samaria through jobs and an improved quality of life, and that many would rather live under Israel’s orderly government than a corrupt, chaotic Arab one with no system of universal justice? You point out that the Palestinian Arab refugee problem was never solved by Israel’s Arab neighbors, who were the ones who created the refugee problem in the first place? You point to the agreement signed at the 1920 San Remo Conference as evidence that the Arab Palestinian homeland is located in modern-day Jordan, and not in Judea and Samaria? You point out that Israel’s national claim to Judea and Samaria goes back thousands of years, as opposed the Arab nationalist claims which never existed? You insist that Jewish holy sites be considered Jewish despite rival Muslim claims, many dating from as recently as 1996? But my dear, as a Jew you are partial (and your religion is, as always, sadly out of fashion), as an Israeli you are a member of that rogue nation, and as a settler you will always be an extremist, prone to violence and racism.
The religions that oppose you are Islam, Christianity, and secular humanism. Each has adherents as zealous as the most zealous settler, but their creeds are not your creed. Their mottoes include slogans such as, “If you can’t convert the Jew, kill him,” “Love your neighbor and hate the Jews,” and “Zionism is racism.” Anti-Semitism (cleverly disguised as anti-Israel sentiment) inhabits every fiber of their being. So complain all you like about Israel’s harsh treatment in the press, in the UN, and even in the United States, but don’t claim to be surprised by it. And whatever you do, don’t think of accusing them of anti-Semitism. That’s just the sort of thing you Jews accuse anyone of who points out your flaws.
Allow me to give you some friendly advice from someone who takes a genuine interest in your welfare (at least as it concerns your relationship with my employer and his minions). Give up your blog. It’s fruitless my dear, and very bad for your blood pressure. And the next time you sit and wonder if this is all a bad dream, if you’ve been wrong all along and Israel really is the demonic state everyone says it is, embrace that feeling. And above all, remember what former UN Secretary General Kofi Annan said: “Can the whole world be wrong?”
Your affectionate reader,